Dead Inside

Product Information

I'm putting this whole review in spoiler tags, I didn't really think of what could be a spoiler or not while writing it though I think no spoiler I give can spoil your read nor prepare you for what you are about to read. I thought based on the hype that this would be the rare book that would be “too much”, but honestly, I frequently found myself bored and wishing for the story to end. This story is pretty much American Psycho meets Exquisite Corpse if Jughead Jones (angsty CW edition) was the narrator, written by someone who never totally outgrew their middle school edgelord phase. I feel bad giving this such a harsh review, but I have to say my piece: the main character is so focused on being as much of an antisocial edgelord as he possibly can be, it overshadows the gruesomeness of the entire plot. This, in turn opens the door to reflections of the legitimacy of legal crimes involving dead bodies such as desecration, necrophilia or even cannibalism.

Dead Inside” is a very graphic read but, I’m a metalhead, grew up in the 80s/90s watching tons of horror movies and TV shows I probably shouldn’t have been watching at such a young age, and at least for me, this didn’t really bother me as I look at it as just words on paper. Whether it is a writing on the philosophy of physics, a bleak and joyless monologue on existentialism or something from the protagonist about his preference for coupling with cadavers rather than living flesh, I demand to be plucked outta my mind and transported along on the author's ship-of-the-imagination. The relationship between the two main characters is fascinating and horrifying, and yet the author employs dry humor that will not fail to make the reader laugh wryly (well, I did) . I found myself skimming over some of the more detailed accounts of specific actions, just to get to the parts where the characters were having a dialog about their feelings or the story had progressed past points of discomfort and I wanted to see what was going to happen.

Since the author made me squirm a time or two, it bothered me; Kudos to the author, that has only happened a few times. His is almost an act of anti-mainstream rebellion, a protest against conventional sex, against the obsession with ever younger, firmer, more beautiful bodies. Things seem to be going smoothly for this utterly depraved individual until he meets a vile woman even more fucked-up then he is.

Dead Inside gives even further food for thought, for instance by presenting victims of consensual violence who die a happy death, prompting its main character to wonder about how fucked up people can get, even more than himself. It’s as though she’s looking into me, like she can see me for the perverse freak that I am, but instead of turning away in disgust, she seems almost captivated.I’m talking about the kind of book that will be stuck with me for a very long time because this is absolutely insane.